Let It Go: Benny's Story by Renee Dc

Author:Renee, Dc [Renee, Dc]
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Tags: Romance, Contemporary Fiction, Contemporary, Literature & Fiction
Published: 2014-12-23T05:00:00+00:00

Chapter 14

Sophie had needed some personal time after reliving all the painful memories she had pushed down. She had tried to stay strong when she told Benny all about her unborn child, but it was no use. Her emotions had overwhelmed her. One minute she was having thoughts about Benny that she had no business thinking, then he was kissing her, and God help her, but she had wanted it. She had liked it, though “like” wasn’t even a strong enough word. The initial shock of Benny’s kiss had quickly dissipated as she welcomed the warm feel of his lips. It was mere seconds only, but as her mind fought her body, she realized what she did, and more importantly, who she had done it with.

The pain and anger she felt over losing Ethan and then losing the remaining part of him was something she never fully grieved. It had felt like she lost Ethan twice, and she just couldn’t deal with it then, so she placed all her emotions in a box in her mind. When Benny came back into her life, everything she had fought so hard to keep locked away had surfaced. It was like Ethan had died just yesterday, and the feelings she had toward Benny came back, too. Only, the Benny she knew now wasn’t the Benny that she remembered from then. It was hard for her to differentiate the two, and in that moment, the past won out.

As much as she wanted Benny to leave her, she wanted him to fight her – to stay and comfort her – because God knows, she never truly got that. Her parents had never really been there for her. God help them, they tried, but they just weren’t great with emotions. They offered to pay for a shrink, but when Sophie declined, they felt their emotional obligations had been met. She stayed away from her home a lot at that time because her grief seemed to make them uncomfortable. She spent time with her friends, and they were there for her, but they didn’t know what it was like. They hadn’t experienced the kind of loss she had. As much as she hated Benny and blamed him – although, that blame had taken a huge beating after he confirmed what she was starting to suspect. Even though she still thought of him as a selfish bastard for whatever part he did play in Ethan’s death, a very deep part of her believed that he would understand what she went through. But the lingering anger and the deep-seated pain were tipping the scales against Benny. When he finally left her in peace, she was both relieved and upset.

Aside from history overpowering her very being, it was the confusion she felt over the very person whom she vowed to hate that had tied her in knots. She wanted to slap him and beg him to hold her at the same time. She called Mason and asked for some days off to get her head back on straight.

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